Hello All or just me I am newly starting my journey into sobriety and am slowly realizing that writing things down helps me understand the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that are going on in my head. Today is DAY 1. Most of the blogs i have read echo the same sentiments,I want to change, how do i change when EVERYONE drinks and its the norm, will I ever have fun again. why can’t i just be normal??? i have done the quit for 30 days only to pick it up again on day 31 because i have “control” over it. I mean obviously i went 30 days. This is my biggest problem, my mind has figured out how to justify continuing drinking and I am so tired of fighting it. I am trying every avenue to get sober for life and I need to be accountable. I am not a good drunk but in all reality who is actually a better person when they are drunk? I am so tired of being embarrassed and feeling alone because I isolate myself so i can sit in my dark room and chug two bottles of wine. Any who this is my journey. I have an end goal to make it to 100 days and after that to make it for a lifetime but just fighting to stay sober today is the reality and i am going to fight tooth and nail. Every step counts.